Sign-apore

Essence of Chicken - Be your best!

Hard "Kaur" at Clarke Quay

Deepavali Holiday Specials at Starbucks

Money certainly can buy happiness - and beer! (Stella Artois)

Expensive until you try it (Which beer do you think is overpriced in Singapore?)

The Lamburghini - For the driven few!

Low crime doesn't mean no crime! (If only New York had this problem...)

Very, very peppery crabs

No illegal workers (in Tamil, Malay, Thai, and Chinese - all other instructions in english)

Crab-ilicious and Durian Delights!

Yesterday's taxi driver was...

Lau Mai is a native Singaporean. He doesn't "speak good English" (There is a poster for the official Singaporean "Speak Good English" campaign across from my apartment).

Me: Tamasek Tower please
Lau: Huh?
Me: Tamasek Tower. 8 Shenton Way.
Lau: Oh ok.
Me: How are you?
Lau: Huh?
Me: Are you well?
Lau: Oh, well. You?
Me: Yeah.
Lau: You go to work this late?
Me: I talk to California from home in the morning
Lau: Oh. You LA or San Francisco
Me: San Francisco, do you have family there?
Lau: No, I went for tour. You work with Hollywood?
Me: No, I work for an internet company.
Lau: San Francisco has the grape.
Me: I'm sorry, San Francisco has the what?
Lau: Grape. G-R-A-P-E.
Me: Oh, you mean the wine?
Lau: Yes! The wine
Me: Oh yes, they have very good wine. You can look at the grapes and then drink the wine. I miss all the wine in Singapore, we don't have as much here. Which do you prefer, LA or San Francisco?
Lau: Vancouver. I have relative in Vancouver.
Me: Oh, did you visit them?
Lau: I visited them, very nice.
Me: What time of year did you go?
Lau: 2001
Me: Ah, did you go in winter or summer?
Lau: December.
Me: Wow, were you cold?
Lau: No, it wasn't so cold.
Me: Did you see snow?
Lau: No, No, I went to Seattle.
Me: Oh, there's the building.
Lau: Oh, sorry, sorry (drives past the entrance).
Me: You can drop me here.
Lau: (Silence...$0.60 on the meter later...) Sorry, sorry.
Me: Hrm. Thanks.

Today's Taxi Driver Is....

Buck. The first non-native Singaporean taxi driver I've encountered, but who has lived in Singapore longer than almost all the others. His father brought him from China to Singapore in 1940 to avoid the Japanese invasion of China. He said Singapore was safe during the war. I knew he'd be fun to talk to when we got really excited about Tamasek Tower and said something very enthusiastic, and totally impossible to understand. Then he said "u-turn, ya? no ERP! hahaha!" (ERP is the electronic tolls for driving in certain parts of the city at certain times. Lazy drivers won't avoid them and will charge you $2-3 a pop). We were fast friends.

He lives at Bukit Timah junction (in a flat, not in the actual MRT junction, he specified). He speaks hoquin (sp?) the taiwanese dialect, but also speaks Mandarin. I said "Wo she janadaren" and then we talked about Canada ;) Oops, probably should have stuck to "Megworun." I told him I was here for 2 years and he said "and you live there for 2 years" gesturing to the Somerset. I said "no, I'm moving to HDB, Real Singapore" - he liked that a lot.

Then he said "you not married? 2 more years, work then marry, hahaha"
Then I said "xie xie" and he laughed and said goodbye in Chinese.

Vietnamese Wedding

I woke up early and went out to explore Hanoi. Everyone else from work, Joann, Joao, Charif, Armin, and Duong were all doing work, so I wandered around the old quarter of Hanoi alone.

The "Ritz" really had the best location in the whole city, right across from the ancient lake that is said to have holy giant turtles in it (last sighted in 2006). There is a temple on the lake, and willows all around it, and a second temple in the middle of the lake, where no one goes anymore.

I'd heard the legend of Vietnamese silk from many people and decided to explore the city to find this amazing craftsmanship, and I wasn't disappointed. After walking past stores selling everything from paper lanterns to original paintings, I came across a store that may have well been called "Silk dresses made for Ashley." I was hooked ;)

After trying on everything in the store, I settled on quite a few items, all of them absurdly cheap, and all of them fitting perfectly. Vietnam has so many people with great tailoring skills that a lot of the designers have their clothes made there, and the leftovers end up in tailor shops. They are modified with the particular tailor's own taste, the tailor's label is sewn in (they aren't "fakes" because they don't claim to be by any famous designer), and they find their way to Hanoi silk shops, waiting for me to buy them.

After my shopping extravaganza, I rushed back to the hotel to change for the wedding, which was at 5 o'clock. Joann and I both hurried and then sprinted for a taxi to get us to the Fortuna hotel. I practiced some Vietnamese phrases that Spring, the girl who worked in the hotel and who kindly sat with me during my breakfast of omlette and baguette, had coached me on.

Vietnamese has more tones than Chinese, and she was impressed that I was able to parrot the phrases back to her. When we arrived at the wedding, there were 2 weddings going on because it was such an auspicious day for weddings, and Linh, the bride actually knew the other bride! Joann and I took pictures with the happy couple, wrote them wishes on a paper that was hung on a little tree, and then waited for the rest of our colleages from work to arrive (Charif and his fiancee, Tomoko, got stuck in traffic for over an hour because of the rain).

The wedding itself was very nice, but very short! The whole thing was over in less than 2 hours! Rings, procession, cake, champagne (for the bride and groom) were all done in less than 10 min! There were about 350 people (a moderate size, we were told), set up at big round tables. Apparently the really important ceremony is actually tomorrow and only immediate family are
invited- we went to the big western-style reception for everyone.

Jellyfish was the craziest thing on the menu, and my favorite item was a little buddha in the middle of the appetizer sampler (not for consumption, we discovered through trial and error...). There are also some yummy french pastries (all of the french pastries in Hanoi were superb), but we never actually saw any wedding cake - I wondered if it was a fake cake there just for the occassion of cutting the cake. Duong and one of Linh's friends from college in England translated all of the announcements for us. Linh floated the room and sat at our table for a while, and eventually her parents and her groom's parents did the same, thanking each person for coming.

Linh changed dresses halfway through the 2 hour wedding because in Vietnamese folklore, girls born her birth year are said to have 2 weddings. In order to prevent a divorce, this means that everyone who's born her year must have 2 weddings at once, and 2 of everything! So Linh had 2 dresses. If I were a wedding planner in Vietnam, I would certainly raid the records to find everyone born that year!

After the wedding, a group went out and chilled at a rooftop bar with a view of the ancient lake and drank Hanoi beer (and OK beer, but not something I would proactively seek out outside of Hanoi). At first Joann and I went to the hotel to change out of our wedding formals, and the boys went to a bar that Duong had heard was popular but had never actually been to. When Joann and I got there it was so sketchy that we joked that the guys had sold us into a brothel, and we all went to find somewhere that wasn't up 2 dirty flights of stairs with "bar" written on a metal door (see pic below...).

It rained off and on- mostly sprinkling, which was a welcome relief to the locals after the previous weeks of excessive rain. It was quite refreshing walking back to the hotel in the light rain, and the temperature was much more pleasant than Singapore, at about 71 degrees and only 70% humidity instead of 100%.

I went to sleep early so that I could be ready for our next adventure to the Silk Village - my silk adventures had just begun ;)

Typical Hanoi street scene

Me & Joann with the happy couple

Me & Linh

Linh and her flower girl

Buddha as a garnish...
Linh & her new husband Bryan!

Textile sales-cat?

"Football star" poses at the lakeview bar - Joao, Duong, Armin, and me

The super sketchy bar

Good Morning Viet Nam

A lot has happened since I last reported in ages ago and I've once again entered the stage where there is so much to write that I procrastinate because I know when I sit down, I will become chained to my blog as I attempt to write an entire novel to recount the crazy adventures of the last several weeks.

I just returned from a weekend in Hanoi, Viet Nam, where I attended the wedding of a girl from the Singapore office. The bride, Linh, does support for Vietnamese customers and lives in Singapore with her new husband. I went with 5 other people from the office to Hanoi for the festivities and it was amazing. Luckily, I kept a little journal on my blackberry while I was there, and I will copy my entries into this blog throughout this week.

Here's the entry from Day 1.

Puttin' on the "Ritz"
I arrived safely in Hanoi and am sitting in the "Ritz" hotel which is down a dirty back alley in the old city. The sign is framed by exposed hanging wires and mopeds. Despite its amusingly bad exterior (see picture below), the room itself actually seems pretty good at this point. For $14US a night, I didnt' have particularly high expectations.

Definitely not the Ritz-Carlton, but generally clean (minus some lovely black hairs in the
mini-fridge) and seemingly safe. It has these crazy windows like the "identify the criminal" one way glass that look like mirrors on the inside but apparently don't block people from outside seeing in. I think they installed the one-way glass the wrong way. I love being in places where
great ideas are executed ever so slightly incorrectly in the most amusing ways (that, along with quite a few other things, remind me of India).

Moped Propane Delivery Service
So far I love Hanoi and Vietnam because it has that same vibrancy and randomness that reminds me that its possible to get along in life just fine by doing what you have to do to get the job done. So far my favorite has been a guy carrying three rather large canisters of
propane on his scooter, one between his legs... There are scooters buzzing and beeping everywhere and that adds to the fun. There is a street vendor with a dalmation outside our hotel
alleyway, the dalmation is very well behaved.

Pho and Baguettes - A match made in Nirvana
I love the contrast of everything. There is that ironwork and architecture of those former french colonies (think New Orleans, Pondicherry, and Beirut) but the climate and historical circumstances make the buildings look pretty decrepit, which contrasts further with their ornate iron and woodwork and bright colors.

There are expensive designer shops and hawkers side by side. Pho stalls next to fancy french pastry shops. Driving through the little streets in the old city we passed stand after stand of stores selling one or two specialties (often very different scecialties- my favorite so far is bikes and fans).

There are also temples/pagodas everywhere (mostly Buddhist), strewn among the old french architecture, exposed wires in huge bunches hanging everywhere, and mercedes driving past scooters with 4 ppl on them. The combination of decrepit French buildings and open wires made Charif, my Lebanese colleague, nostalgic for home in Beirut. There are tons of shops selling colorful tiered temple offerings (in the shape of wedding cakes but in elaborate red and gold packaging) and sidewalk cafes everywhere, sometimes with only one table on the street with young people sitting on the ground, eating hot pot, wearing modern clothes and talking on cell phones. Then an old lady with a pointy straw hat will ride past on her bicycle, and the old and the new contrast again.

Socialist Republic of Viet Nam Visa on Arrival
Arriving in Vietnam was interesting. Apparently we were supposed to bring passport photos for our visas- luckily they take pics for you with their digital camera for $4 (and yes, that needs to be paid in US dollars). I totally panicked when the guy in the official communist military uniform asked for my picture.

Me:"Holy shit! Are they going to send me back! Will I be like Tom Hanks but stuck in the Vietnam airport?!"

Charif didn't have a picture either, and I sheepishly asked the customs official if we could have them taken there. He didn't seem too upset or surprised about our lack of protocol and whipped out a digital camera. He took our pics and put them into the annals of their computer system. I guess the $4 was the "stupid tax"- or perhaps more the smart tax since it was was cheaper and easier than getting real passport photos taken in Singapore, albeit intensely more stressful.

Joann, my third traveling companion, had her extra passport photos ready to go and had them stapled into her passport by the official, but Charif and I were shooed along. I never understood why some countries put a second photo in your passport- there is already a pic in your passport, why do they need 2?

Throughout the process Charif was amused by the fact that Joann and I, as Americans, also had to go through the process of acquiring visas, a process that his Lebanese passport has allowed him to enjoy every time he enters almosts any country, including the US.

Despite the "hardship" of my visa application process, I'm now the proud owner of a full page Vietnam visa with a decently-sized red communist star stamp on it - totally worth the trip itself.

Viet-What?
It was dark when we arrived, but there was very little evidence of th flooding. Everything seems perfectly normal in this part of town. The flight was more than half empty and I'm soooo glad that I came because so far I'm loving the quirky adventure and it doesn't seem dangerous at all (knocking on wood...).

So far I've also been struck by a few other things. Number one is how I know shamefully nothing about Vietnam. Basically my image of the country has been formed by Forrest Gump and Apocolypse Now. This doesn't seem like it can possibly be the same place.

I think they know that this is a common problem so they have not one but 2 in flight magazines at Vietnam Airlines, "Heritage" and "Heritage Fashion." These were simply the best in-flight magazines I've ever read (taken with the grain of salt that they include quite a bit of Communist propaganda). I was really tempted to take them, and I might sneak them on the flight home. They do say they're complimentary, but I wouldn't want to deprive future passengers of the deep insights they offer...

They had all sorts of cultural and historical information and included articles, short stories, and poems by their readers. Each section was repeated twice in a row, once in Vietnamese
and once in English, but each section had different pictures. There were some fascinating articles.

One followed the history of Hanoi in the 20th century from the French colonial days through the August Revolution, the "American Invasion" and modern times, all through what went on in one house in the old quarter of the city.

Welcome to Iraqi Airlines Flight 238 from New York to Baghdad. We hope you enjoy your desert safari holiday today, November 10, 2038.
Another told the story (unbiased, I'm sure...) of one of the key leaders of the communist government over the last 40 years, named Madame Binh. I wish I knew enough history to compare and contrast the Vietamese version of the "American Invasion" with the American version of the "Vietnam War." In the car from the airport, Charif asked Joann and I if we felt weird being American in Vietnam, and after thinking about it for a while, I realized that I actually do. I started feeling weird waiting for the plane, and the feeling grew as I got closer and closer to Vietnam.

What I couldn't stop thinking about was that many people are old enough to remember when our countrymen napalmed them. Sorry guys. We napalmed you and had no idea that you have this
vibrant ancient colorful culture and that you're a country full of human beings who have the same feelings as us. I wonder if in 30 years, my children could be on an Iraqi Airlines flight on their way to some desert safari and feel something similar. The idea seems so preposterous.

We hereby sentence you to death by elephant squashing
My favorite article in the in flight magazine was one that gave a little blurb of history about the people who have a bunch of stuff named after them. My favorite story, which should totally be made into a major motion picture goes as follows (I actually took notes with a pen on the back of my hotel confirmation because I was so inspired on the flight):

Bui Thi Xuan was a female general during the tay son
rebellion(1771-1802). They say she saved her future husband from a
tiger attack (story disappointingly lacks details on this).she was an
expert at martial arts and helped the tay son army train elephants for
battle. She led an army of 5000 men against the nguyen army. In 1802
she and her husband were captured. He was decapitated and she was
executed by being squashed to death by an elephant.

Now seriously, I can't make this stuff up. I don't know why fiction writers even bother! They should just go study some history! Guy fawkes standing in front of the gunpowder waiting to get caught under parliament, death by elephant squishing- truth is definitely stranger than fiction.

Tehehe, that guy fell off a mountain...
The flight was generally nicer than expected. I ate fish curry (better than expected) and tropical fruit (lychee, pineapple, and watermelon), and potato salad with pastrami (odd pairing indeed).

There were 2 americans in front of me who kept asking the stewardess if the wine was free. She was confused, I think partly because of the language barrier and partly because pretty much every legitimate Asian airline has free booze.

They had a few TVs that came out of the ceiling and showed what I believe may have been the reject pile from 'Americas Funniest Home Videos' where instead of the funny "oh, they're not that injured..." You're like "holy shit, did that guy just get killed?" One clip had a guy falling down a mountain. No getting up and laughing, just falling off a mountain and then onto the next video of a parachute that doesn't open. The Americans in front of me were laughing pretty loudly at these. Ho hum, my countrymen.

Barack Who?
Speaking of countrymen, I grabbed a copy of the Vietnamese newspaper with the Barack Obama headline. That should certainly be a unique souvenir- who needs the New York Times when you can have the Thanhnien Instead?

The best part of the Vietnamese paper? Barack Obama wasn't even the top story! In fact, the story was on the BACK page. Following 20 pages of pictures of communist officials giving speeches and children posing in school. It may have been one of the few newspapers in the world that didn't have a Barack Obama top story.

What a unique experience I'll always associate with this historical moment. More to come on the adventure in tomorrow's blog post.

"Puttin' on the Ritz"

Dalmation street vendor outside "The Ritz"

Death by elephant-squishing

Today the world has changed

Everyone is excited. On the other side of the world. People are cheering, watching in anticipation, Americans, Singaporeans, Brits, Aussies unite to watch Obama give his speech.

Today isn't just for America, it's for the world. But it's not the end, it needs to be the beginning. Let the real work begin.